Well apparently he's into motor boating.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
