we're blogging at a bar
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
