Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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