ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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