I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I have feelings that need drinking.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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