Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
