I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Go christen that room with your naked body.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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