quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
