Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Randomize
