Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Randomize