I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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