I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
how do you play pong handcuffed?
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
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