she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
