Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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