ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize