I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
