when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
