two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
