just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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