My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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