2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
areolas are like halos for boobs.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
