He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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