I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
