either way he was missing a nipple.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize