We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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