Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Randomize
