Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(925): View more from California

it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.

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(703): View more from Virginia

bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..

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(512): View more from Texas

If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(781): View more from Massachusetts

What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?

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(606): View more from Kentucky

This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.

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