I hope mine doesn't look like that
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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