She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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