I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
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