why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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