Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
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