I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
