if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
