Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
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