i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
