We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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