it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
