for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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