real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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