I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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