I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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