Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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