Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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