Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
