He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize