I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize