David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
