I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
