After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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