i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Randomize
