is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
